I am a terribly disappointing person sometimes. That might would be true if you know me from online and then showed up at my house. You’ll see my basket(s) of unfolded laundry, the wrinkled shirt one of my boys is wearing. You’ll hear the irritation in my voice. I’ll say something stupid and need to apologize. The nice thing is that people in my physical life are used to those things.1 As they have gotten to know the good things about me, they’ve seen the ugly. They are intertwined.
But that’s not the only way I’m disappointing. Sometimes people come to me for advice and I know they are waiting for a grand answer and I tell them something horribly boring.2 And then I insist that the horribly boring thing is actually the answer.
A couple of weeks ago, I sat down and talked to a woman. God has done a miraculous work in her life over the past six months and she was sharing about her desire to do more for God. Perhaps she might be called to ministry? Or might should go to the mission field? I listened. And then I started asking questions. Finally, I told her that she needed to start by simply spending time with Jesus.
Make your aim so boring you don’t want to tell anyone what it is. Then do that small, “boring” thing every single day. Come back and let’s talk in six weeks.
If you’re feeling an overwhelming desire to do something for God, stop and ask yourself if you spend any time just being with God. Do you know God? Do you know yourself in God?
In college, I went to a small Chinese buffet with two friends who were dating. At the end of the meal, the guy bought a plate of red jello to the table and his girlfriend’s mouth dropped open. He hated red jello but he insisted that he was going to eat it to prove how much he loved his girlfriend. He was being silly and we all laughed but we do that a lot with God.
Instead of doing what God asks of us, we pick something else and insist that will demonstrate the amazing level of our love and devotion. Of course, if this man had wanted everyone to see his love for his girlfriend, he could have done it with everyday, “boring” things: listening to her when she talked, paying attention to her life, honoring her as a person. Those things are a lot harder than shoving down a plate of disgusting red jello. They also aren’t as showy. You can’t take pictures of them. People aren’t going to notice and applaud. Matter of fact, most people might think they are the bare minimum of being in a relationship.
We are to remain in Jesus’ love. John 15 is one passage that allows us to contemplate what it means to be in relationship with God, to know God and to know ourselves in God. Jesus loves us with the love the Father has for Jesus. We are to remain in that love and we remain in love by keeping Jesus’ commandments. The commandment is that we love one another as Jesus loves us.
Often we want to go do things for God out of fear, to prove something, to guarantee our own spot. Instead we are to know God’s love for us and extend that love to others. Once we are on that path—because it will continue on and on for each of us—we will find God inviting us into His work.3 We can only move safely into that work from a place of love.
Go and be one with the Father as Jesus was. Get to know God. Get to know yourself in God. Make it a consistent part of your life. See, first, if perhaps that spot where you are is not exactly the mission God has for you before you leave it for something else. It will look so boring you’ll be tempted to not do it. Do it anyway.
I almost put “real” life and I changed my mind. The part of my life that involves the internet is also real.
My favorite part about my work is how often I get to hear people’s stories.
God is of course, not singular or masculine. Nevertheless, God is a person (not an it) and God is one (not plural). The limitations of language are real.
This was a wonderful read and very timely for me. I don’t know where I picked up the idea that God wants me doing something for Him over being with Him, but I’ve struggled with striving, performance, and earning His love for far too many years. It’s a hard habit to break.
I’ve been exploring this in my own writing. I keep seeing this (needed!) correction to the idea from the the 90s that we need to do “radical” things for God. Thank you for adding to the conversation.